I probably should go back and read posts I’ve written earlier. I may be repeating myself. But this thought or theme is something that has been on repeat in my mind and my life throughout my life. It is something that comes into play in the most profound experiences of life and in the most mundane.

Relationships.

Think back to your earliest memories. Do you see a place? Maybe. A thing? Maybe. An emotion? Maybe. AND I’d wager that your earliest memories have to do with a person or perhaps people (family? neighbors? grandparents?). I am notorious for having a TERRIBLE long term memory (and my short term isn’t so great either!). I’m wondering about my earliest memories – will they be centered on people, places, things, or emotions?

Here’s an example where they all come together – I think I was about 3, maybe 4. One morning, I was sound asleep (this part has been told to me) and my mom had to run my sisters up to the elementary school that was only a couple short blocks away. She didn’t want to wake me (I’ve always been a bit grumpy upon waking in the morning, but that’s another post) so she took the chance on going and returning before I woke up. Oops.

Here’s where my memory kicks in. I woke up in a house where no one was home except me. I went to the front door and opened it. I think there was a screen door there then and I looked across the street toward our neighbor’s house (place), the Herzer’s. As I was terrified, I started screaming and crying (emotion) until I think it was David, came running across the street to see what was the matter (person). He stayed and comforted me until my mom returned, a bit chagrined.

So was it the emotion, the place, or the person. In this case, I’m going with the emotion.

When I was six, we moved up the hill and up the hill from that house was Dunsmore Park. (Yes, the Densmore’s lived on Dunsmore Ave. Weird, huh?) In those years, there was an incredible summer recreation program for kids. It was run by “Lippy”. (I think his “real” name was Mr. Lipniski.) All summer long there were games, pet shows, a wading pool, drama classes, snacks, kid-made carnivals, and more. I don’t really remember much about the activities (except that Tuffy won the “longest tail” in the pet show), but…

…what I do remember about those summers was that I woke up (grumpy), ate some cereal and then hurried up the hill to the park as soon as I knew the staff would be there. I hung out at the wading pool EVERY DAY of those summers because the lifeguards (all young women) treated me like I a junior lifeguard. They were kind and engaging and must have liked kids. They always made me feel like I was their favorite. They made me feel important and that I contributed to the fun ambience of the pool. They also gave me responsibilities like testing the water for chlorine and cleaning out the leaves. (Likely they just found someone who would do the chores with a smile!) I remember one lifeguard in particular who had found a lost kitten. She asked if I wanted to adopt it. I did, but I had a dog and parents who weren’t too keen on pets. And yet, they let me adopt “Sunshine”. Sadly, it didn’t work out because our dog, Tuffy, was having none of it so we had to take the cat to the Pound. Side story – Sunshine ended up making it in the local newspaper because the day we dropped her off a reporter did a story on pets for adoption at the Pound. I always comforted myself with the thought that she was likely adopted because who would see that cute kitten and not go get her?

Anyway, back to the people…I looked up to all of those lifeguards in their white shorts and red shirts. I literally stayed there every day from the moment they started filling the pool in the morning until the moment they started draining it in the afternoon. Then I went home, walking in the gutter with the chlorinated pool water rushing down the street. One time I even got a bee sting in that leaf-filled gutter water, but it didn’t matter – I’d get up and repeat the process every one of those long days of summer.

So people are key to my summer memories though place and emotion play important roles, too.

You see where I’m going here? Me neither. Seriously, when I started this post I thought that the memories I would share would focus on the people. So far…it’s at least a mix of people, place and emotion.

Let me get to an example that I KNOW will focus on the people – my first job.

Anyone who knows me, knows that I LOVE Trader Joe’s. I think I may have mentioned that I worked there WAY back in the 70s when it was a different kind of store. BUT one thing that has not changed…the culture of that store is ALL about relationships – between “crew members” and customers. Even 50 (ouch!) years ago I can attest that we were encouraged to be a collaborative, supportive team of colleagues. We were encouraged to engage with our customers, know them by name, help them find products and HAVE FUN! There was no job too trivial for management to complete or to high falutin’ for a young teenager to attempt. I have super fond memories of Mr. P, Kim, Dick, Cindy, Mike, Tony and so many others. It was the BEST job for a teenager; the hours were flexible, pay was great, plus even as a part-timer, they contributed to my retirement. When I “retired” in 1980, I got $27! But I think that the real importance of this experience was learning that having positive relationships at work, makes work feel less like work and more like a fun family. I think this early experience is why as a teacher, I always looked for a school where we worked together as a team.

And one more thing about Trader Joe’s – I mentioned at the beginning of this post that this theme of relationships matters in profound AND mundane moments of life. Is there anything more mundane than food shopping? (Don’t answer that. I know that there are hundreds of mundane tasks that we do every day!) And yet, to this day, every time I go to TJ’s, some crew member connects with me as a shopper. There is still a feeling of being a part of the “crew” and that as a shopper, I have a “relationship” with Trader Joe’s. That doesn’t happen at Safeway so going there is drudgery whereas going to TJ’s can be fun. (Maybe someday I’ll write about my very unhappy relationship with Safeway. But that would just turn into a complaint-fest.)

Okay. Trader Joe’s memories definitely focus on people and relationships. (Phew. Found one that fits my theory.)

Which brings me to my many years in education. Except…this post is long enough so I think that I’m going to ponder my post on relationships in education a bit longer. It’s too important to gloss over quickly and it merits its own post.

What do you think so far? Where do relationships fit into your bank of memories?

What a silly blog post title!?!

It is January 1st, so absolutely Happy New Year. 2021 was such an interesting year. Much struggle (COVID, diverging social structure and on a personal level – health and my continued evolving relationship with work). AND a wonderful amount of adventure. This whole Blog is dedicated to our evolving adventures, so enough on that.

I’m in as good a “place” as I’ve been in many, MANY years heading into 2022. For most of the last 40 years the turn to a new year always brought the prospect of what we refer to in my business as Busy Season. It is only in recent iterations that I have grown to love Busy Season. Admittedly that is contributed to by my diminishing role in the ultra grind of tax and financial statement compliance. So, there is that aspect, yet it also feels like so much more. I’m learning to let go and let my baby (TYS, LLP) grow up without my heavy handedness. I have children, yet I didn’t birth them. Chris York and I (with Tim Shortsleeve coming later) birthed TYS, LLP. At least emotionally. Having the confidence that your “baby” can go out in the world free of one’s heavy handedness is a truly wonderful feeling. AND letting go is so incredibly hard.

So, what is this thing about FIRE. Well, FIRE is a thing. It is an acronym for Financial Independence Retire Early. Read about it if you are interested. There are some wonderful guides out there that will help you ask the right questions.

I’ve been living this since I graduated college at 25 in 1983 and entered the “professional” workforce. My grandmother, whom I have written about extensively, was a huge influence on this part of me. First, I am an accountant, so I like to measure things. It’s what we do. From day one I always maxed my contributions to retirement accounts. AND when JDT and I got together / married in the mid to late 80s we continued to use various vehicles AND to become habitual savers. Our savings goals always had equal seats at the table with our plans for vacations / adventure. I somehow knew there would be benefits from this path, I just didn’t yet call it financial independence.

Life always presents us opportunities. The only questions are do we have our eyes and ears open AND are we receptive to them as opportunities? In 1993 I was fortunate to have met someone who became an incredibly important part of my life. Jim Gebhardt and I met on a golf course at a trade association golf tournament. At the time Jim had recently moved to the Bay Area from Western NY (whole separate story). Jim was working at Aetna Surety as a surety bond underwriter. So we had mutual client interests and could therefore get our employers to pay for some or most of our early golf boondoggles. Jim’s career evolved to become a financial advisor, first with Merrill Lynch, then with Smith Barney and finally where he is today – owner of his own independent financial services firm, Gebhardt Group, Inc. (GGI). I became a client of Jim’s from his early days at ML. To make a real long story short, I am a RAVING fan of Jim and GGI. If you want someone to partner with in your financial life, there are many really good options available. However, if you want a partner in your life who happens to use financial tools, seek out Jim and GGI. It will make a difference. For the Thomas family, it is foundational!

I refer to myself as a “recovering planner”. It’s meant to be a bit of a humorous spin on “recovering alcoholic”. My point is, left to my instincts, I will create a plan for most everything. Early in our relationship JDT and I were polar opposites in this respect. Live in the moment versus plan for everything. Our progress has been meeting in the middle. I believe I was a good guinea pig for Jim to play out much of his vision for how to run GGI. If results matter in the judgement of success, well you get my point.

The real point of this post is to discuss my “struggle” with FIRE. All of the above was to create a context for the discussion that follows.

Previously, I’ve blogged extensively on my views of struggle. Simply, it is the good stuff in life. Or, maybe more accurately, usually the precursor to the good stuff in life.

I see there being two, clearly separate, yet highly connected aspects to FIRE. Financial Independence AND Retirement Early. Yes, we have had a fair bit of struggle with the FI part of FIRE. There was a time in 2008 where we considered bankruptcy as an option. But outside of that difficult time, it has been a steady, slow slog. The only way I know how to eat an elephant is one bite, one day at a time.

AND the RE part of FIRE has been a wholly different experience. In many ways I consider myself to have two very different lives – pre and post cancer. I still consider February 17, 2009 to be my 2nd life birthday. It was the day I was declared “free of disease” or as lay people like to say, cured! It was such a huge mental shift for me. I began to live more in the current (less, but more strategic planning), I started to think more deeply about life after work. I was unable to work for 4 to 5 months while in treatment. Work was taken from me. AND I realized how much my work meant to me. How much I LOVED it! I even began to contemplate a date for “retirement”. Then in 2015 while doing some deep planning with my TYS partners, I first used a date – June 30, 2020. Everything I did at TYS from that point contained an element of June 30, 2020. At first it was on the periphery. AND as we got closer it moved more to the middle of the room. Frankly, TYS did a wonderful job of preparing itself as much as possible. Me? The results have been more spotty. My early efforts involved exploring things I could do that would plug one passion in place of another. This included teaching at Chico State. I even “co-taught” a couple of sections of Principles of Financial Accounting. I also explored starting a cancer support group. Each of these efforts are on pause, as in fall of 2020 I learned there was other work to be done first.

I’ve not blogged about Jim Kelley. Hardly believable for me as not more than a couple days goes by that I don’t think of Jim. He entered my life in 2003 or 2004. We shared a mutual client. We collaborated on that client. Jim was a life coach. Jim had a very interesting background. He touched my life in ways few have. Jim passed 8ish years ago. I still bring him with me to most important meetings. Jim’s life partner is Jennifer Kelley. Jennifer is ying to Jim’s yang. They were magical together. I was talking with Jennifer about 3 or 4 months after June 30, 2020. She, like Jim is a great questioner AND even better listener. She asked me how I was doing. Normally, I would have said something like fine, and gone on to what would have likely been an unfulfilling conversation. Not this time, I said a was struggling. Jennifer knows me well, and knows TYS, etc. She asked a few more questions that I tried to hold myself together to answer. Then she asked me if I wanted her opinion. Swallow hard, YES! She went on to offer that it might be possible that I had suffered a loss on June 30, 2020. AND that before I could effectively move forward that I needed to grieve my loss. LOSS? Hell, nobody died. As a matter of fact, this was THE PLAN! So, how could it involve loss. We talked for another 10 to 15 minutes and it became clear my loss was of my career (life long love affair), my relationship with my partners (no longer in THE ROOM where the MAGIC is created) and that my baby had grown up and was ready to leave the nest. WOW! And from this point improvement occurred. Yep, it has been a bumpy road when one tapers off of habits. I’ve always been a cold turkey person. I went off Oxycodone (part of pain management during treatment) after 4 months cold turkey. With my relationship with TYS, I was tapering.

Why am I so optimistic now? Well, when we got back from BK in November I found myself back in old tired habits. This got to the point where JDT called me out on it. As a conflict avoider, it takes a lot for JDT to confront. So WHY? I’m coming to realize I have reached another bump in the road of tapering. This one was again my mindset. I was still connecting, or making everything dependent on my perception of TYS doing what I believed they should be doing to guarantee success. I wasn’t, in my mind and framework, letting them have their own struggles and believing in their successes. I don’t need to solve their problems. I should focus on ME. They will be fine. They are fine. They are GREAT! So, I am working really hard at decoupling my life from TYS all the while creating all the joy possible from the work I do at TYS. It feels somehow different. Hence my optimism as we enter 2022.

Happy 2022!!

I’ve been thinking about a post for a long while. And wondering…why was it so easy to find topics while we were in Brooklyn? We’ve been home for a month and a half and I’ve posted once. It was “Is Happiness a Place?”. I often profess that there is much happiness to be found in the little things. In fact, I believe that the little things are the essence of happiness. If we spend all of our days waiting for the big things to make us happy, then I think we will largely be disappointed. So why haven’t I been inclined to write about the small things while at home? Are blog posts only merited when there’s a big thing? Do the many small things that occur daily merit their own post?

Did I live a profound life in Brooklyn and a not-so-profound life here at “home”? Am I more observant when I’m away from home? Do I pay attention to the details more? Do I take things for granted here? Is life away just more interesting? Do I have more time for reflection? Is there something about newness when away?

Wait. I think that’s it. At least it rings true right now. Newness creates profoundness. Newness creates a finer sense of detail. I pay attention more. I observe more, therefore I have more thoughts. Routine and familiarity deny profundity. (Wow. I keep coming back to that thought – routine vs familiarity. See earlier posts.)

Solution. Slow down and pay attention. Note the details. Stop and reflect. AND do new things. Go to new places. Meet new people. Learn new things.

NEW = Profound? Maybe?

Great minds think alike. Glen texted me yesterday saying that he’d written a post. I had been making some mental (and recorded) notes about thoughts that had been rolling around in my head. And since we’ve returned, many people who I didn’t even know were reading our blog, reached out and asked us to continue. Thank you for your encouragement. Here goes…

There are many sayings about “place” that resonate with me…home is where the heart is….a place in time…happiness is a direction, not a place…somewhere over the rainbow…home on the range…I understand that my interpretation of “place” may be broad, but my real question is…Is happiness a place?

Returning to Walnut Creek after our 3+ month trip east, I found that what I looked forward to upon our arrival was reconnecting with the people who make it home. Family is the first thing that makes a “home”. The presence of Niels and Blair in Walnut Creek creates that sense of “place”. Friends also create that “place”. They provide many joys – be they hiking friends, make-me-laugh friends, make-me-think friends, listening friends, pushing me friends, dinner table friends…you know and have those people in your lives, too.

And I think that what I learned on my meanderings in Brooklyn is that happiness is not a place. “Place” holds many memories – activities in a place, the beauty of a place, the food of a place…and what I deem to be the real importance of “place” – the people in a place. When I think of what really mattered in Brooklyn – after all the photos, all the walks, all the food – it was the people who made the memories. The people who created the “place” in my heart. I have thousands of photos of buildings, nature, street art, bridges… and few photos of the people of New York and yet my strongest memories are the faces and words of the people. People whom I will likely never see again, but whose small and large kindnesses have touched my heart.

So going forward, wherever we may land, I’ll be looking to the people – the strangers, the family members, the neighbors, the new and old friends, the shopkeepers, the street peddlers, the unhoused, the baristas, the restaurateurs, the passersby, the Metro riders, all the people…and maybe I’ll become that weird old, white-haired lady sitting on the park bench photographing the “place” by photographing the people who are the true heart of a place because…

“Place” is where the heart is.

The Holidays. They are so fascinating to me. And maybe not for the reasons you might think.

It’s been 4 weeks since we arrived back in CA. And don’t get me wrong, it has been wonderful to be with our children, see some friends and spend time with my wonderful clients. I do love them all. AND I find myself slipping back into those habits we’d done such a great job changing.

I love JDT for the way she is able to push forward, regardless of what is put in front of her. She’s had more than a few obstacles since our return. Yet, despite those sometimes huge hurdles, she soldiers forward. I hate being one of those obstacles, yet here I am.

JDT went through old cards and notes over the long wekend. The image above was from a note my Grandma placed into a 1990 birthday card to JDT. You’ve read some of my earlier musings on my Grandma. There were a few things that struck me about this note. First, she was in her 89th year when she wrote this. OMG! What beautiful handwriting – those skills were so highly valued back in her life. She’d go on to live to be 99, and pass just two weeks shy of her 100th birthday. Second, her comment about Niels brings back such fond memories. He was less than 6 months old. And last, her comment about family takes me back to the days I spent at her house in Lower Diamond, Oakland in the early to mid 60s.

I have shared with you that my writings tend to be more extensive during my darker periods. I’m really sorry for that. AND I am thankful I have this platform to work through these periods.

I hope each of you have the most meaningful Holidays ever!!

Stream of thoughts. recollections, wonderings, and questions coming…

While leaving Brooklyn was a paradox (two things can be true per Glen) – it was incredibly sad AND there was also the anticipation of getting home to family, friends and familiarity. The sadness was ameliorated because I was looking forward to having a visit with my niece and her husband, Erin and Conrad and my grand nieces and nephew – Victoria almost 9, Carter 7, and Brooke 4.5. And oh boy! What joy! We plunked ourselves down at their house in NOVA on Halloween and got to carve pumpkins, read books, enjoy a neighborhood potluck and go trick or treating! I have not had that much fun in a long time! Those kids are each so different and all so endearing. What a wonderful way to start our journey home! (And I ticked off a new state – Delaware.)

On to Knoxville via Virginia. The drive was beautiful with rolling green hills and fall leaves. It is such a beautiful part of the country.

Then through Tennessee to Arkansas. A couple days ago, Glen posted about a stop for bbq in Memphis – a road highlight. I will say that as we drove through Memphis, there were some beautiful neighborhoods and it was interesting to see St. Jude’s which we all know is a wonderful foundation for children.

Next stop Little Rock. Arkansas was another new state for me. The first thing I noticed was that there were WAY more billboards for “adult only” stores than I had seen in any other state since we left CA in July. What’s up with that? The second most frequent billboard was for gun and ammo stores (local and online stores). That was no surprise. But my favorite memory of Arkansas is this story that I posted on IG and FB:

What could go wrong? Taking Dug for a walk in Arkansas. Went around the corner from the hotel. It was like I crossed into another world (think Deliverance without the river). I was kinda wondering if this road was a good idea (thinking I had watched too many movies) when a loose dog came running toward us from down the road. I turned Dug around and fast-walked back where we came from with this dog catching up to us quickly. A banged up red truck (of course) came out of nowhere and the driver and passenger started hollering at the dog to go back. The dog kept trailing us and now the truck. So the truck pulled up alongside me and the passenger gave me a big stick saying “…just in case…” and then drove off. Obviously we made it back safely, but I did have to threaten the dog with the stick a couple times.

That’s it for me and Arkansas.

We blew through Oklahoma (new state) and on into the top notch of Texas. Can’t say as I have a lot of specific memories of either state. Except…I did feel like it was the longest stretch of I-5 between Bakersfield and Sacramento…it went on forever and ever and ever, if you get my drift.

I also noted that I’m surprised that we have a shortage of goods because OMG – there are SO many trucks on the road. I mean SO MANY!!! And they are heading west and east. The rest stops and gas stations are packed at night with truckers sleeping in their cabs so those goods should be arriving at our stores soon!

We landed for the next night in New Mexico and I have to say I’m a bit curious about New Mexico. The landscape was interesting, the people were friendly, and I want to go back and spend some time exploring. We found a great family-owned Mexican restaurant in the tiny town of Santa Rosa. The young lady who took our order and brought us our food was maybe 12 years old. By the time we left I wanted to pay for her college tuition. She was incredible! That girl is going places! I wish I’d asked for her name! I wanted to do a little exploring and take some pictures, but after my dog experience in Arkansas, I was a little gun shy so I had to satisfy myself with a few pictures from the main road through town.

Zipping through Arizona, I was a bit annoyed that their rest stops were all closed. The signs along the highway did not indicate the closures so we didn’t know until we got there. When you plan your “relief” spots around the “rest” stops, that can be a problem. Come on AZ. You can do better.

AND – while masks were required in New Mexico, they apparently are not in Arizona because we have not seen ONE person wearing a mask. Well, that’s not entirely true because I’ve seen Glen and he’s seen me. I looked up NM COVID stats vs AZ stats and as you’d expect, NM’s vaccination rate is higher and COVID rate is lower. Simple math.

Anyway, here we are in Kingman, Arizona for our last night of our most incredible adventure. We got in early and it was a beautiful 81 degrees (after starting our day at near freezing) so Dug and I walked down Hwy 66 to a park. The dogs in the dog park were too scary for me (therefore for Dug) so we walked down a side street back to the hotel. Glen and I then ventured into town for dinner at a place that he found on Yelp. Sadly, when we got there it was permanently closed. COVID? Lack of tourist business? Kingman is a quintessential small town that is dying for lack of industry and the newer highway now skirts around the downtown. The town is really trying to make it a place to stop and the downtown looked like it would be fun for poking around. But sadly, times seem to be passing it by…

What’s that I see? Los Angeles?

One late afternoon, Glen and I were walking on a busy street in a Brooklyn neighborhood that we hadn’t been to more than once or twice. At that hour, there are always lots of people out and about – school kids, parents and strollers, workers coming home, tourists ;-), etc. . As a group of 6 or 7 moms with elementary-aged kids came toward us on the sidewalk, one of the young girls tossed some candy trash toward a trash can and kept walking. She looked straight at me as she did it and I could tell that she knew that what she did was wrong and yet…

Now, I will tell you that as a teacher (and a mom) there have been MANY times when I’ve struggled to keep my mouth shut when I saw a child doing something that wouldn’t fly at school or home. (My kids used to give me the evil eye when they could tell I was struggling to MYOB.) But sometimes, I just can’t stop myself. So as she kept walking, I said something like “Uh-oh, you missed!” The moms sort of made motions to get her to go and correct her mistake so she came back, picked it up and gently put it on top of the trash can. I said something like, “That’s just going to end back up on the ground when the wind blows”. I could see that she really did want to do the right thing and then I realized the real problem was not that she didn’t care or was lazy or careless. She didn’t want to lift the trash can lid to drop it inside. She didn’t want to touch it.

COVID has changed many things in society, some good, some not-so-good. This little girl was clearly afraid of the germs she might contact by touching the trash can lid. I got it. I understood. So I looked at the moms to make sure they weren’t freaked out by this crazy gray-haired lady, called the young girl over to the can and said, “I get it! You don’t want to touch the lid! This is how I do it!” I picked up the trash, used it to lift the lid, and then quickly tossed the trash inside before the lid came crashing back down. The girl and the group of moms and kids with her, all watched me finesse the trash into the can. You would have thought that fireworks had gone off with their “oohs and ahhs” when the trash safely landed inside the can and I hadn’t come in contact with the “infected” lid.

The little girl looked seriously happy with my performance. The moms thanked me and everyone moved on their paths with the little girl skipping along her way. Sometimes, you just have to stop and see the issue through someone else’s eyes. There are very few problems that can’t be solved with a little compassion and understanding.

Imagine..

Day three of our drive through the drive across began early again. We left that city with too much ugly orange and made our way from the rolling hills of Eastern Tennessee to westernmost Tennessee and Memphis. We approached the city and began to talk about lunch. Mostly on the road during these ambitious drives we don’t invest a lot of time in our meals, we try to make them easy. I’ve been all around Memphis, but never any time in the city. So, I asked JDT if it was OK if we were a bit more adventurous. AND as always, she said yes. I went on my phone and the place in the photo came up and resonated with me. The directions took us off the I-40 corridor and into the heart of Memphis. I’d always heard that Memphis was a tough town, kinda like Oakland. Hmmm.

I love BBQ. Pretty much any kind of BBQ. Yes, I love the king of BBQ (brisket) above all others. I think I found a close 2nd. Memphis is a pork town. Memphis is a BBQ pork ribs town. AND not the Carolina mustardy sauced variety. Their own “brand”.

JDT was driving, so I read up a bit on Payne’s offerings. Small number of items done very well. So, as we drove up I got this vibe that this “was going to be very good”. Then I opened the door as we arrived and the wonderfully smokey aroma flowing out of this place just made me smile. I went inside, got in line then ordered a half slab and a chopped pork sandwich.

We switched back over to me driving and we drove away. JDT opened the wrapping around the pork sandwich. What a terrific homemade sandwich. A hamburgerish bun with chopped pork butt, mustard, slaw, pickle and who knows what else. Delightful! That was gone in mere minutes. Next, it was on to the ribs. You should know that ribs are not really JDT’s thing. So, I was on my own. The styrofoam box included 8ish meaty sauced ribs, some potato-ish salad and 4 slices of white bread. It dawned on me. This is a different version of Everett & Jones (E&J). E&J is an Oakland institution that I have frequented for nearly 40 years. Wonderful Soul Food. The Payne’s BBQ soul food rivals E&J.

Two hours later we got to our hotel in Little Rock. I ate two more ribs. Plus I have some to take with me tomorrow!!

Sometimes life is just perfect!!

We began what I call our drive through the drive across states. Yesterday afternoon and last night we were with JDT’s niece and her family. They are wonderful with three under nine and it was Halloween. Well, let’s just say I am not as young as I once was.

We spent the morning and early afternoon driving from Northern VA diagonally down to Eastern Tennessee. We’re staying on the outskirts of, as Blair puts it, that town with a bunch of ugly orange. LOL!!

We decided not to dine in as we drive through the drive across. We, and frankly the vast majority in NYC are practicing safe habits. Down here, much less. So, upon arrival in that ugly orange town, we were hungry so we got takeout from a place nearby (a short walk). A short while later, JDT wanted a Wendy’s Frosty and I wanted some milk to go with the cookies we baked for the journey. We walked down to the Wendy’s. OH NO, the “dining room” wasn’t open, so I proceeded to see if I could walk through the drive through. Talk about strange looks from the people in their cars in front and behind me. Well, they wouldn’t take my order. Killjoys!!

We spotted a minimart as part of a gas station across the road. I proceeded to start to cross the road, and wait for it . . . JDT asked, “where is the cross walk”. OMGoodness, I nearly died laughing. The picture as part of this post is looking back with the Wendy’s on the right (see the Wendy’s outline) and the minimart on the left.

How many southern institutions can you make out from the photo?

Sometimes life is just too perfect!!

Out of sequence, but I want to share a bit about David Byrne’s American Utopia show? Concert? TedTalk?

Visually, its simplicity was stunning. It opens with Byrne seated at a square table in the center of the stage. He’s holding a “brain” in his hands. As the stage curtain rises, around the sides and back of the stage, curtains of beads that look like water falling, begin to rise. It gave me the sense of David being seated in the center of the 9/11 Memorial fountain (a square) with the curtains being the outside walls and waterfalls. I couldn’t help but see it as symbolic.

I’ll let Glen share more about the show as he’s the David Byrne/Talking Heads fan, but I do want to share one take away from the show. And there were many thought-provoking moments…

Toward the end, he talked about the pandemic and said something like …if we’ve learned one thing through it all, it’s that once everything is stripped away and we’re left with what truly matters, we’re only left with two things. “You and me. Us.”

Us. Full circle back to Glen’s post(s) about the circle of life and our shared purpose in this Brooklyn adventure. Us.

And thank you for being part of our “us” and joining us on this journey of “us”.